We are Not Meant to Live in Darkness

The other day I was waiting in line at Walmart when I overheard an interesting conversation.

“I could retire in two years if my husband would just die,” the cashier said to a coworker before motioning me to the register.

She then repeated the statement to me.  “I could retire in two years if my husband would die.”

“Really?” I said, unsure of what the proper response to that should be.

She nodded.  “He dies and in two years I can collect his Social Security.”

“Does he know this?” I asked her.

She shrugged.  “I don’t know I haven’t seen him in eight years.  I check, every year or so, with Brevard Arrest Records to see where he’s at.  Still in jail.  Usually drunk and disorderly.”

I just stared at her.

Seriously, what are you supposed to say to something like that?

In just thirty seconds, she had basically told me that she had a really horrible life, or at least a horrible marriage, and that her future happiness was dependent on someone else’s death.

Life is hard these days for so many people.

Last week, I read about a fire at the apartment complex I used to live in many years ago when I first moved to Florida.

It brought back a lot of memories, like the time my neighbor tried to set fire to my door and I didn’t know about it until I left for work the next morning, turned to lock my door and saw the scorch marks.

In the time I lived there, three people in my building died.  There was vandalism.  There were robberies and break-ins.

For a while, I slept every night on the couch with a hammer in my hand, ready for someone to break through my door.

I lived there for six years.

And when I read about the fire the other day, all I could think was how in the world did I live there for six years?  And why did I think it was okay to live in a place like that at all, for any length of time?

Whether you’re a cashier at Walmart or living in a crime ridden neighborhood, whether you’re you or you’re me, the world seems like an awfully dark place these days, doesn’t it?  People suffering in so many ways.

But honestly, the worst thing that can happen to any of us right now, is for us to become complacent, for us to think darkness is the way of the world and that’s just the way things are, to accept this darkness as normal or to accept that we have no control over it—my friends, that is a path we must not take.

What I wanted to say to that cashier at Walmart was this: “I’m sorry.  I’m sorry you’re married to someone who has spent more time in jail than he has with you.  I’m sorry you’re so unhappy.”

And if I could go back in time and talk to my younger self sleeping on the couch and fearing for her life, I would say, “Get out of here.  This is not the life God intended for you.  He does not want you to live in fear.  He wants you to live in faith, faith that you are loved, faith that you are a child of God.  He loves you so much.  You are worth more than this place.”

This is not the life God intended for you.

How do we know, though, God’s desire for us?  How do we know His intentions are good?

How do we know that God wants more for us in this life than just suffering?

C.S. Lewis suggests that suffering is God’s gift, referring to God as the sculptor and saying, “The blows of his chisel which hurt us so much are what make us perfect.”

And Paul writes in Romans 5:3-4 “And not only that, but we also boast in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope ….”

So does all the darkness and suffering in the world serve a purpose?  Does God want us to suffer?

In Genesis, did God want Joseph abandoned by his family and sold into slavery?  Did God want Joseph falsely accused of rape and left to rot in prison?

No, He didn’t want these things.  He wanted Joseph lifted up.  He wanted Joseph to save a nation.

Joseph says to his brothers in Genesis 50:20, “Even though you intended to do harm to me, God intended it for good, in order to preserve a numerous people, as he is doing today.”

You intended to harm me.  Joseph’s brothers.

Not God.

Or let’s look at another of my favorite verses (and I am partial to the NIV translation), the verse most likely to be printed in a card for graduating seniors.  Jeremiah 29:11 reads, “‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ’plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’”

God does not harm us.  He does not schedule suffering into the itinerary of our lives.  He is not responsible for the darkness in our lives.  His ultimate goal is for our wellbeing.  His ultimate goal is to give us hope, not sadness.

As we see with Joseph, God will use our suffering to do good things, but He does not cause it.

God’s plan is to bring us out of darkness.

Let’s look at today’s Gospel reading from Luke 1:67-79, specifically the last two verses, “By the tender mercy of our God, the dawn from on high will break upon us, to give light to those who sit in darkness and in the shadow of death, to guide our feet into the way of peace.”

The poetry alone in those words—it’s beautiful.

These words from Luke refer to the coming Messiah, to the one who will “give light to those who sit in darkness.”

We’ll see more of this light in next week’s Gospel reading.

But this is God’s promise.

We are not meant to live in darkness.

If I could speak again to the cashier at Walmart, after I apologized for the horrible life she has had, I would tell her this, “This is not the life God intended for you.  God did not intend for this darkness to come into your life.  God loves you so much.  And He only wants good things for you.  So take a deep breath.  Remember who you are and who loves you.  You are a magnificent and wonderful child of God.”

Amen.